Oh, How Times Have Changed

We used to do brunch on the weekends.  A lot.  We would go out, walk around the city, window-shop, and eat delicious brunch.  Something amazing like rum-banana french toast and strawberry salad.  I would look cute when we were out, too.  We would be gone for hours.  Usually a nap followed brunch, because brunch included Long Island iced teas.  Life was good.

Fast forward eight years.  Envision a birthday weekend.  What do you expect to see on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon?  Cute outfits, Long Island iced teas, and birthday brunch, right?  Wrong.  So wrong.  Instead, our day consisted of mismatched pajamas, grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup, and football. 

At one point, Nick and I were watching football and having an actual football conversation.  A back-and-forth conversation that included team comparisons, player personalities, and critiques of Terry Bradshaw.  These things came out of my mouth.

And then I'm pretty sure I had an existential crisis.

Who am I?  Who are we?  How has this happened?  Who have we become?  Mind you, that Nick was the one cooking the lunch, and I was the one watching the football.  Times have changed.

This is one of the first pictures I have of Nick and me.  We had no idea what was coming for us.  We had no freaking idea.  No way to prepare.  No way to protect ourselves from any drama or hurt or frustration.  Because in the beginning, you can't know these things.  You just jump right in.  And if you are lucky, you have a loving, exciting, drama-free life together.

But maybe one day, in the middle of your loving and drama-free existence, life hits you in the face like it did to us.  Discredits all your plans.  Makes you question making all of the "right" decisions along the way.  What if we had gotten married sooner?  What if we hadn't spent the year after we got married traveling?  What if we hadn't waited so long to try this or try that?

So many what-ifs in life.  We were lucky to be pretty what-if-free for a long, long time.  And then we weren't.  That's just the way it goes sometimes.  And when life is filled with what-ifs, sometimes you can only dig your feet into what you have, hang on, and let the rest work itself out.  Which sometimes means pajamas, grilled cheese, and football.  It was the best birthday yet.